After the cataclysm, we’ll all have to find unexpected uses for familiar things after the cataclysm. The Vienna Vegetable Orchestra is already prepared:
Many bloggers will find this hard to believe, but there are people alive today who were born before the television was a household item.
They remember life before there were such things as Social Security and the CIA. They remember having to entertain themselves by playing outside, singing aloud and using Go Fish sets that didn’t have little mermaids on them. Many of them, no matter what part of the country they’re from, remember growing their own food. Most remember cooking their own meals, or at least having someone around to cook meals for them.
These people are great resources for preparing for the global climate change cataclysm. They remember the life you’re likely to find yourself living. Limited access to electricity, reduced to depending on the sweat of your brow to get what you need.
So get out there and meet some old people. Learn from them how hard life used to be. They have the tips to help you survive it.
My last tip was all about wind-up electronic gadgets that will help you survive the climate change cataclysm. When our political, economic, social and electrical grids all collapse from environmental destruction, you’ll still be able to power up flashlights, radios and even cell phones with your own physical strength. No batteries or electric plug-ins required.
Then I remembered that for wind-up gadgets of the communications variety to work, it takes two. At least.
After the cataclysm, will there be any radio stations to listen to on your wind-up radio? I’m thinking that all the cookie-cutter, Clear Channel dreck we hear on the radio will go bye-bye the day the cataclysm hits. I mean, if the people who produce that garbage weren’t being paid to do it, they wouldn’t show up at the studio. Right? I hope not.
On the other hand, people who create innovative, informative and interesting radio programming are going to keep on doing it no matter whether they’re paid or not. If you’re on the radio to provide a public service, you’re doing it because you love it. I bet you’ll keep doing it after the cataclysm. You’ll be more important then, while mainstream commercial radio will become even more irrelevant than it already is.
So start your radio show right now, to prepare for the cataclysm. Get together with a group of friends and set up your own low power FM station, one that will broadcast good quality programming that addresses local needs and interests. It’s going to take a few people, some serious time and a bit of money, so you’d do well to get on with the organizing now. The good people at the Prometheus Radio Project have lots of advice on offer.
Seriously, after the cataclysm there’s not going to be any Federal Communications Commission around to keep you off the air and give away spots on the radio dial to the highest bidder. Problem is, if you wait until after the cataclysm to start your station, you won’t be able to find the equipment you need. Sure, do the cost-benefit analysis and apply for the license if you must, but don’t wait to start your own station. Fly the pirate radio Jolly Roger with pride! Even if all you’ve got is an Ipod.
My wind-up radio is cranked up and ready to tune in to your station.
Low power FM image: New Orleans Indymedia
I found this charming video on Bryson Nitta’s The Third Wave blog:
It’s so wrong on so many levels.
Mining is one of the most dangerous jobs in America, with people dying on the job from injuries and off the job from black lung and other diseases. “Sixteen Tons,” the 1946 Merle Travis song GE cleverly uses in the ad is all about the physical and economic abuse of workers. On top of that, the product they’re trying to greenwash (and “bluewash” at the same time) is coal, which is doing more to contribute to the coming global climate change cataclysm than any other source of electricity.
The ad is two years old, but it seems so fresh in light of all the other energy misinformation we’re being fed these days.
The page shows an adorable blue ant playing energy games and taking energy quizzes, and it offers classroom activities for teachers! And how about this fun fact: Did you know that ink and crayons are made from fossil fuels?
Hey, DOE, did you know that some aren’t?
But here’s what really got me steamed. On the first page, where they explain How Electricity Is Generated, DOE writes that
Solar power is derived from the energy of the sun. However, the sun’s energy is not available full-time and it is widely scattered.
Widely scattered? So is petroleum. So is coal, America’s #1 source of electricity. But DOE doesn’t mention that. Solar is the only energy source that DOE describes for kids as having any problems at all.
DOE – as well as children and their parents – may be interested to know that the sun exists in more places on Earth than either oil or coal. The only reason coal and oil don’t appear to be “widely scattered” is because we’ve developed complex delivery systems for them. If we’d spent the last five years investing in collection and delivery systems for solar power rather than on an expeditionary army that’s consuming more than 3 million gallons of oil a day in Iraq, maybe solar power wouldn’t seem so scary to the Dept of Energy.
Hey, kids. Don’t be fooled.